I was on a discovery call recently with another business owner who has ADHD when they asked me a really interesting question:
How do you manage your own ADHD so that you can support other people with theirs?
It’s a fair question.
It’s also something I’ve wondered whether people might be thinking without asking. I’ve certainly asked it of myself.
I’m open about having ADHD. I’m also someone who helps business owners plan, prioritise, make decisions, stay accountable and move work forward.
When planning, organisation, working memory and maintaining focus can all be affected by ADHD, how can one ADHDer reliably support another?
Lived Experience Helps, But It Isn’t the Whole Answer
There is value in understanding some of these challenges from the inside.
I’ve experienced executive function challenges myself, worked with clients with ADHD diagnoses, ADHD traits and other executive function difficulties, and I’m a Certified ADHD Support Specialist.
But ADHD doesn’t look the same in everyone. My experience doesn’t mean I automatically know what another person needs.
It does mean I may recognise some of the friction.
And whether I’m working with someone with ADHD or not, I’m curious about that friction. If you’re not doing something you intended to do, I want to understand why. If something repeatedly isn’t working, I want to know what’s getting in the way.
I’m not looking for what’s wrong with you. I’m looking for what isn’t working for you.
That’s how we find an approach that fits you, rather than assuming what works for me will work for you.
I Plan to Be Organised 📋
This is probably the simplest answer to the original question:
I plan to be organised.
I have scaffolding. Tools, habits and structures that support the things I know my brain doesn’t always do reliably on its own.
If somebody tells me something I need to do, I don’t think, “I’ll remember that.”
There’s a good chance I won’t.
So I use Todoist. Tasks get dates and, where necessary, notifications. I use my calendar and a weekly planner. I take copious notes and record calls where appropriate.
I’ve written before about getting things out of your head and externalising them. This is what that looks like for me in practice.
I don’t need to remember everything because I’ve deliberately created somewhere else for that information to live.
What Does That Mean for My Clients?
After a recorded client call, I’ll check the transcript for anything I need to follow up on. I’ll also have notes in my Pukka Pad (I love a Pukka Pad!) to cross-reference. Anything requiring action becomes a task.
If something needs doing at a particular time, it gets a dated task and notification. I won’t clear the notification until I’ve done it.
I use the same principle with communication. A WhatsApp message can stay unread until I’ve responded. An email can stay unread until I’ve replied or resolved whatever needs doing.
Before another call, I can look back at our previous notes, agreed tasks and progress.
I’m not relying on my working memory to make me reliable.
And sometimes I’ll remember something at 11pm and worry about forgetting it until I can get it out of my head and safely into the right system.
Once it’s captured somewhere I trust, I can stop carrying it.
The Scaffolding Is Everywhere 🧠
It isn’t just work.
I have a magnetic meal planner and shopping list on the fridge. If we run out of something, it goes straight on there.
I have a key rack. I come through the door and my keys go on it.
I don’t need a complicated solution to losing my keys. I need somewhere I habitually put my keys.
The tool supports the habit. The habit supports me.
I also use structure. I have time blocked in my diary for certain types of work, including CEO time to review my business plans, marketing and business admin.
I’m not waiting to remember at the right moment. I’ve created a place for it to happen.
None of this is foolproof. Sometimes a system that worked for months stops working. Sometimes the meal plan says chicken and at six o’clock I discover the chicken is still frozen.
The aim isn’t perfection.
It’s knowing where friction tends to appear and putting useful support around it.
Isn’t That Just Being Organised?
To an extent, yes.
Calendars, task lists, routines and key racks aren’t ADHD inventions.
And I do like being organised. It’s become part of who I am, although maintaining that doesn’t always happen effortlessly behind the scenes.
That’s the important distinction.
A lot of my organisation is something I’ve deliberately built.
Much of it started long before ADHD was even on the horizon for me. I didn’t know I was creating ADHD scaffolding. I just knew there were things I needed to find ways to manage.
So Can Two ADHDers Work Well Together?
Absolutely.
Not because our ADHD will necessarily look the same, or because having ADHD means I’ll automatically know what another ADHDer needs.
I bring professional training, experience, curiosity, lived understanding and first-hand experience of finding practical ways around my own friction.
My clients don’t need me to have a perfect brain.
They need me to be reliable, listen, think alongside them, remember what we’ve agreed and help them find approaches that work for them.
Having ADHD doesn’t prevent me from doing those things.
It means I’ve become very deliberate about how I make sure I do them.